1. You spend a third of your day saying “Pull your damn pants up.”
2. You spend another third of your day saying “Pull your damn skirt down.”
3. You spend the remaining third of your day with the horrifying realization that the amount of adolescent underwear you see daily would get an adult in any other profession arrested.
4. You can sing the lyrics to Justin Bieber’s “Baby, Baby, Baby,” list the Twilight books in order, and/or name all the characters in Jersey Shore even though you’ve never seen a single episode.
5. When you hear this: “The ELL RtI student isn’t managing his STEM classes despite 504 accommodations so now he’s being re-evaluated for SPED,” you know that all it really means is that you’re going to have to attend another meeting.
6. You have freaked out a complete stranger by attempting to confiscate her cell phone for using it at an inappropriate time.
7. You can check your email, use the bathroom, eat a snack and make a lesson plan for your next class…in one passing period.
8. Your idea of IT help is to look plaintively at your students and ask “So which one of you can fix this?”
9. You have an overwhelming urge to pee every time you hear a bell ring.
10. You cannot, for the life of you, fathom why anyone would voluntarily choose to work with adults when they could have hormones, attitude, and bad-ass creativity…all before eight in the morning.