The Don’t Go Down in Flames on the First Day of School Checklist

  1. Do you have lesson plans?
  2. Do you have a bagged lunch or cafeteria money?
  3. Do you have seating charts?
  4. Do you have a steady source of caffeine?
  5. Did you set your alarm?
  6. Did you double check that your alarm is set to 6:00am and not 6:00pm?
  7. Did you pick out a cute outfit for the first day? (Males: Do you have something unwrinkled to wear?)
  8. Does your cute outfit consist of layers appropriate for an average classroom temperature of 41 – 98 degrees Fahrenheit?
  9. Are you wearing comfortable shoes?
  10. Do you know what your schedule is?
  11. Have you posted your schedule somewhere easily visible for when you forget what your schedule is?
  12. Do you know where all the cool teachers eat lunch?
  13. Do you know exactly how long it takes you to go to the bathroom?
  14. Does the time requirement from #12 realistically fit into your passing period? (Please adjust for travel time to the bathroom.)
  15. Do you have an accurate estimate of how long you can control your bladder without leakage?
  16. Depending on the answers from #11-13, do you have a back-up stash of Depends in your desk?
  17. Have you recruited someone to make you dinner that night?
  18. Do you know the log in information for your computer?
  19. Do you know who to track down when the log in information for your computer doesn’t work?
  20. Do you know the preferred bribe of the person who fixes log in information on your computer?
  21. Do you know the full name, location, and bribery preference of the following: a) the head secretary, b) your hallway custodian, c) whoever signs your paychecks?
  22. Do you have a teaching emergency kit consisting of the following supplies: a) duct tape, b) bandaids, c) more bandaids, d) more duct tape
  23. Have you stocked up on your favorite beer/wine/de-stressing beverage of your choice?
  24. Have you cleared your weekend plans to account for recovery time?
  25. Am I missing anything?

Good luck.

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10 Responses to The Don’t Go Down in Flames on the First Day of School Checklist

  1. Chrystal says:

    I love this list, but it comes a week too late for me. We have already been in school for a week here in the South.

  2. Anonymous says:

    Unfortunately, I started last week with no chairs for students to sit in, needless to say….I’m going to be making up for that classroom management debacle for weeks. I really hope I have chairs tomorrow. fingers crossed.

  3. Leah says:

    Reblogged this on Soapbox Rhetoric and commented:
    Definitely going to print this baby out and put it into my teaching binder.

  4. karen mahon says:

    Reblogged this on disrupt learning! and commented:
    Just to mix things up a bit, I thought this would be fun for all of you who are teachers! Have a great first day back (whenever that may be…for some of you, today!)

  5. janien says:

    Dit is op The Sausage Machine herblogden reageerde:
    Add your thoughts here… (optional)

  6. Pingback: checklist voor maandag 2 september 2013 #terugnaarschool | The Sausage Machine

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